Midweek Rundown

Here's a couple of ri-fucking-diculous things that we've found this week.
First off: Ew, ew, fucking ew, gross. Dude's a creep. Straight up. He was creepy as a softball coach, so hey, let's put him in charge of the swim team. What could go wrong? Let's go get high.

Next at bat: Tear ass, Torrie! And it's not the first time this has happened? My favorite line from the sheriff-"...doors are locked for a reason, and these not locked caused this problem." Indeed.

This one sounds familiar: Dude really wanted a fuckin hot dog. Fuckin really, folks. Quit driving your cars through shit unless there's metal blaring, pyros goin off, drunk rednecks screaming, bikini-clad chicks cheering,....wait what were we talkin about? I gotta go drive my car through some shit. Peace the fuck out.

and have a nice government-invented consumerism holiday. (ain't they all?)

A quick one for the weekend.

Yeah, they couldn't figure out the sex of this fuckin turtle after 50 fuckin years? Glad that zoology degree's workin out for ya.

Fuckin....really?

I just started this fuckin thing. Like literally right the fuck now. Let's get the fuckin ball rollin, y'all....

In the past month or so, I've seen like 6 incidents where a car drove through a building. For real? Is this the point in history where cars finally say "fuck it, we've had enough?" Are you that big of a Dark Knight fan? (Don't answer those questions, dumbass, they're mad rhetorical, yo.) Here's a couple of stories I pulled up for your sexy lazy selves. Alls I gotta say is, fuckin....really? L2Drive, holmes.

We started off light today. More pressing issues to come (maybe). I'm goin to fuckin bed.